


Remorse

by sunshyndaisies (writergirlie)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-11-23
Updated: 2010-11-23
Packaged: 2017-10-13 08:20:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/135150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writergirlie/pseuds/sunshyndaisies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry asks for Hermione's forgiveness for being the one who brought about her torture at Malfoy Manor</p>
            </blockquote>





	Remorse

Harry associated giggling with the likes of Parvati Patil and Lavender Brown—silly, airy girls who spent what seemed like the whole of his stay at Hogwarts girlishly laughing over one vapid thing or another. Not Hermione, though. While she was not without a wicked sense of humour, she had always been more of the discreet laughter variety; her kind of laughter was wry and intelligent, and full of meaning.

 

This, however, was unmistakably, incontrovertibly, giggling, and if he’d never heard it himself, he would have never believed it.

 

“Hermione?”

 

A few seconds passed after his knock before he heard shuffling, and then the door opened a crack. Ginny peered out, then upon seeing it was him, smiled and opened the door in earnest. He tried not to notice the neckline of her maid-of-honour dress. Auntie Muriel wouldn’t be any happier with this than she was with the one Ginny had worn at Bill’s wedding.

 

He made a mental note to thank Hermione later for her taste in fashion.

 

“Oh good, it’s just you,” she said breathlessly, before pulling him in to give him a kiss. Then she turned behind her. “It’s OK, you can come out. No groom in sight.”

 

“ _Just_ me?” he said, in a mock wounded tone. “Have the sparks gone already?”

 

Ginny rolled her eyes, but apparently wasn’t too annoyed to give him another kiss. There was a slight rustling, then a moment later, Hermione emerged from behind the mirror, clutching the skirt of her wedding dress so it wouldn’t drag across the floor.

 

“Oh,” she said, her cheeks pink from fresh laughter, “were we being loud? Could you hear us all the way upstairs?”

 

Then her eyes widened at the sight of the still-open door, and she rushed past him to slam it shut.

 

“Can’t be too safe,” she said. Then with a wink, she added, “Ron could be lurking.”

 

“D’you want me to put him in a Full-Body-Bind till we’re ready to get started?” said Ginny. She was obviously joking, but Hermione suddenly got a look of terror on her face.

 

“You wouldn’t…”

 

Harry failed to suppress a snort.

 

“She wouldn’t, would she?”

 

Before Harry could reply, however, there was a thunderous bellowing that came from below.

 

“WHO DRESSED THE GNOMES IN PINK TUTUS AND LET THEM BACK INTO THE GARDEN???”

 

At once, Ginny cringed. “I thought George was only kidding about that,” she said, then she shot an apologetic look towards Hermione. “I’d better get down and help Mum straighten this out.”

 

Hermione didn’t seem too bothered, though—in fact, she seemed to be holding back another giggle. She looked as though nothing could mar her perfect day (other than Ginny putting the groom into a Full-Body-Bind).

 

“Promise me we’ll elope,” said Ginny in undertone, before kissing him and leaving to join her frazzled mother.

 

Harry was still chuckling to himself after she left. When he turned back to look at Hermione, she was readjusting her veil in the mirror, pulling pins from her mouth and placing them in her hair to hold it in place. She caught his eye in the reflection and smiled.

 

“Come to check up on me, have you?”

 

“Well I had to make sure you hadn’t changed your mind,” he said. “Ron might throw himself into the Thames otherwise.”

 

She laughed.

 

“Actually, your beloved sent me down here with a message.” He held up an envelope that bore Hermione’s name in Ron’s messy scrawl. “He didn’t want to take any chances with the whole groom-can’t-see-the-bride-before-the-wedding business.”

 

Hermione’s eyes filled with tears as she gave another shaky laugh. She took the envelope from him and caressed it gently with her hand.

 

Harry smiled as he watched her, then said softly, “You look… beautiful, by the way. Really beautiful.”

 

Her mouth curved into a grin. “Always a tone of surprise.”

 

“I didn’t mean it like that! I meant… you look really happy.”

 

“I am,” she said. “I’ve never been happier.”

 

“Good. I’m glad you’re happy. You deserve it.”

 

A silence fell upon them, then she must have noticed something in his face, because she said suddenly, “What’s wrong, Harry?”

 

Taken aback slightly, he looked up at her, not really knowing what to say, not really knowing himself why he felt he couldn’t quite look her in the eye at that moment.

 

“Is it Ron?” she said. “He’s all right, isn’t he-”

 

“What? No, of course he’s all right. A little panicked that he’ll forget his vows, but holding up otherwise.”

 

“Then… what?”

 

Harry shook his head. It took a while before he found his voice, and he surprised himself by the words that came out.

 

“Do you ever think about it?”

 

He hadn’t mean to blurt it out this way, to let the question come in a tangle of random words, rather than the one that he had carried with him for the last four years.

 

But asking for forgiveness was never easy.

 

“That night… at Malfoy Manor,” he said quietly. “Do you ever…”

 

He couldn’t bear to finish the sentence. He couldn’t bear to look at her and broke the gaze.

 

“Yes.”

 

He closed his eyes at her answer.

 

“Sometimes… I get nightmares. Ron has to hold me until I stop crying.”

 

His throat closed. He remembered Ron screaming her name over and over, the look of anguish on his face at the sound of her tortured cries, and he remembered feeling so helpless at the knowledge that it had been him who had brought this onto her.

 

“I’m sorry,” he said. The words didn’t seem nearly enough.

 

“Harry-”

 

“It was my fault. I never told you… I never told you how sorry I was… _am_ …”

 

“Harry…”

 

He felt her move towards him, felt her hands cup his face and raise it so that his eyes were level with hers.

 

“Look at me,” she said. “Look at how happy I am now.”

 

“Do you forgive me?”

 

She smiled. “Do you forgive yourself?”

 

“I don’t… I don’t know…”

 

They were both quiet, then Hermione said softly, “Arthur said something to me once—when Ron and I told him that we’d got engaged… He said that the best revenge was a life well-lived.”

 

Harry looked up at her. He couldn’t help but return her smile.

 

“That’s exactly what I’m planning to do. Live a good life. Live a damn good life, as a matter of fact.”

 

Harry laughed, feeling the weight of his long-carried burden lift at last.

 

“Wise man, that Mr. Weasley.”

 

“That he is.”

 

She released a heavy sigh, then touched her hand to her hair once again.

 

“Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve a wedding to get ready for!”

 

“Right,” he said. “I’d better let you get back to it then.”

 

He closed his hand around the doorknob, then heard her once more.

 

“Harry?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Keep an eye on the groom, won’t you?”

 

He laughed. “You’ve got it.”


End file.
